Our eyes met and something changed.
Something washed over me at that moment as we were oblivious to our surroundings and what was to come. It was just another chain in the continuous events that would grab hold of me when I would least expect it and show me that there was something more there that I didn’t understand. I stood there with a room full of strangers as I sang ‘leaving on a jet plane’ with hushed eyes upon me, but all I saw was you. It was supposed to be nothing, the end of nothing, but it turned out to be the beginning of something.
I can never forget that realization because it’s always the most beautiful and scary epiphany that someone can have. The epiphany that you can fall in love but that you don’t know how or when you’ll fall. When you realize it’s out there and that you’re staring right at it the next question is whether you can grab onto it and hold onto it.
I slid my hand over, slowly. Sometimes I grabbed too tight, sometimes my grip loosened. Then one day it was out of my hand and I never realized how cold my hand would be after that. I never realized how well it fit into my hand when I didn’t try to move it around or form it into something else. But my hand and I are optimistis.
Just because something falls out of your hand, doesn’t mean it won’t ever be there again. Maybe the hand needs that time to remember everything about itself…what makes the skin smooth, the fingers grip and the nails healthy. Soon, it will be better. And even if it doesn’t end up back in your hand, just knowing that it could end up in someone elses grip that fits it just as beautifully is unselfishly comforting.
Sometimes the most comforting thing to have, are memories, because you never know if that will lead to more beautiful ones.
